Glory [e-sports] - Chapter 195: Perhaps his help was a new form of imprisonment for Asleep.

During the Chunin Exams, a mysterious screen hijacks Konoha's arena, broadcasting the shinobi world's most shocking secrets, pivotal future events, and utterly embarrassing moments, sending Kages, legends, and genin alike into a hilarious frenzy.The air crackles with anticipation during Konoha's Chunin Exams. Genin face off, crowds roar... and then, BAM!A gigantic projection screen materializes out of thin air above the packed arena, silencing everyone. This is not on the schedule. Before anyone can react, it flickers to life, broadcasting scenes that should never see the light of day.Get ready for reactions that rewrite history (and dignity):Mei Terumi (Fifth Mizukage): *Eyes widening, then narrowing suspiciously*: “Hold on... Madara Uchiha's 'invincible' fire style... extinguished by a Water Barrier? Is this some kind of advanced Genjutsu prank, or did someone seriously just splash water on the apocalypse?”Ōnoki (Third Tsuchikage): *Clutching his lower back*: “My aching joints! And the screen says I'm going to willingly ride atop the Fourth Raikage like some kind of... decrepit flying squirrel?! Preposterous! My back couldn't take that speed!”A (Fourth Raikage): *Face turning purple, with veins popping* :“WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?! STOP LOOPING THE FOOTAGE OF MINATO MAKING BEE LOOK LIKE A FOOL! TURN IT OFF! BEE, IF YOU START RAPPING TO THIS, I SWEAR I'LL LARIAT YOU INTO NEXT WEEK!”(Nearby, Killer Bee subtly starts beatboxing under his breath, yo!)Hiruzen Sarutobi (Third Hokage): *Sweating profusely as Kushina Uzumaki glares daggers from the stands, holding a spectral frying pan*: “K-Kushina, my dear! That scene where Naruto painted the Hokage Monument... again... it was taken completely out of context! He was... expressing youthful exuberance! Yes! And I definitely didn't bribe him with ramen to clean it up! Please, listen to reason... and put the ethereal kitchenware down?”Danzō Shimura: *Eyes colder than ice*: “Exposing Root operations? Revealing my contingency plans... or lack thereof in that particular future? Unacceptable. This screen poses a threat to Konoha's stability. It must be... Eliminated Permanently.” (He discreetly signals an Anbu who immediately bowed).Uchiha Madara (From an undisclosed location, sensing a disturbance in the Force... err, Chakra) : “An unseen hand manipulating the narrative? Revealing destiny's secrets before their time? Insolence! Who dares play director with my grand stage?!”From Kage summits gone wrong to legendary shinobi's secret guilty pleasures (did Jiraiya really wear that?), the screen reveals all.The entire shinobi world watches, mouths agape. Hidden truths are dragged into the sunlight, future tragedies are foreshadowed, alliances tremble, and enemies start taking very detailed notes.One question burns hotter than Amaterasu: 'Who is behind this chaotic broadcast, and what earth-shattering secret will they expose next.'

Lao Li’s family finally gave birth to a girl! It’s a pity that we are on the road to escape…

Mrs. Li: What should I do? My baby has lumps and no milk to drink!

Jiayin spat out bubbles of saliva and waved her little hands: “Don’t be afraid, I have space, bring your own rations!” then…

Li Laosi: Mom, I picked up a dairy goat on the roadside!

Li Laosi’s wife: Mom, this rabbit hit the tree by itself!

Li Laosan: Mom, I went to fetch water, and the big fish jumped into the bucket!

Li Laosan’s wife: Mom, a handful of rice actually makes a pot of rice!

Mrs. Li’s head was buzzing. With the blessing of her ancestors, she was giving birth to a little lucky girl, who would prosper her family once she was born! As a result, when I turned around, there was a pile of dates, apples and pears on the kang…

Mrs. Li: “Wait a minute! Fu Niu’er, let grandma slow down. We have good things, but we have to take them out slowly!”

Li Jiayin: Hehehe

- Description from novelbuddy

Why is there a person on Mars who is not wearing any protective clothing?

The Martian: Aliens

Jason wearing a hockey mask stabbed someone in the back and was cut in half with a backhand? !

“Friday the 13th: Backstab”

Kerrigan brought the swarm to the human colony star, and found that countless equally ferocious monsters had already been prepared.

Zerg Descends: Biochemical Frenzy

…

“Ha, why does every time I go to a world, I always encounter some strange things!” Li Wei’s hands turned into dark red claws, provoking Freddy’s small body.

- Description from novelbuddy

This is a story of a captain of a secluded place and a gorgeous female celebrity—both who would hardly cross paths but a collision in Tibet sets an opening to their encounter.Upon their first encounter, Wenxian already has her eyes set on Captain Lu—her mouth drooling with desire.Wenxian, “Hmm? How can I win over your heart? In a plain sack or using sweet talk?”With a cigarette in his mouth, Lu Xiao scoffs. “You are an impressive and popular celebrity, I am only a captain at this secluded place. I am very poor, what is it in me that you like about?”Wenxian, “I like how you always snub back at me.”Lu Xiao choked and walked away heartlessly. “You are shameless, don’t even dream about it!”The next day, he said, “It’s all because you were carried away by a whim?”Wenxian, “No, hatching a scheme.”