PREVIEW

... s and dogs playing and being wholesome? But there's a danger in such things! Cute-Addiction is a REAL and PRESSING issue that is affecting MILLIONS of young Americans right now.

Enemies of our proud nation are seeding our internet with disgusting videos of kittens and puppies and... and otters being cute and cuddly. Why? It's not because they love such things themselves! It's to distract US from the REAL issues!"

--The Fear Inquirer, Issue 144, June 2032

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Crack ...

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Now that my life is not in imminent danger, shall we leisurely think of ways to avoid death?

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