Getting reborn: I will make a harem this time.-Chapter 62: A distant past, an unachievable dream

"Ahahhaahha...."

My laughter gradually came down.

The one present right now... was it me?

Or it was one of those people’s?

I have no idea; I was trying my hardest not to lose my focus, but was I even capable of that anymore?

Or was there even a strand of my consciousness remaining?

I had no idea.

Then after what felt like a millennium, I began to talk.

"Magnificent, simply magnificent."

I praised something. But what it was? I have no idea about that.

"I expected nothing less from you."

"Feels strange talking to myself like this. I don’t know if the one talking is even me."

"During this long span to reincarnation and death... I never knew when I lost myself."

I then raised my head, looking at the top of the room.

"There was a place where I wanted to be, wanted to reach, but while doing that, I went too insane, without realising I began to develop many different personalities."

The dark chain that bound me began to loosen, and I was finally able to move my body.

"Your willpower is really great. Among all the lives I have lived till now, this one probably was the best. It must be feeling too strange, isn’t it? Well, I understand."

I then started to walk away from that circle and stopped in front of the broken statue.

"From the memories, you might have known about the path that you will take, but do you know why? Why this path only?"

I then squatted down, looking at the statue. My eyes softened while doing that.

"I have failed countless times, lost myself so many times that I couldn’t even keep track of. But no matter what, I couldn’t forget the feeling that I felt that day.

"It was that day when I decided I wanted that. That goal or my greed drove me so insane that I didn’t look back after that.

"Countless reincarnations, countless deaths... but I never wandered from that path. Even when it wasn’t me who was following that path, I did not stop, until... my previous reincarnation.

"I knew it was gonna be yet another failure, so why don’t I make some preparations for the future? Why don’t I make things easier for the future? That thought appeared inside me. So, I prepared some things for me.

"Well, that could have gone wrong in many ways. I would have failed to grasp the chance this time, or maybe I would have never reached here. The future was unpredictable, but I still did it. Yet another failure, what can even change? I said that to me and continued.

"But I succeeded, wait... maybe not, maybe this isn’t me who is talking at all, this might be you or even one of my other personalities. But there wasn’t anything to worry about; in the end,, we all are one. I might have been called a clown who fooled everyone, but I won’t fool myself, right? I know what I am better than anyone."

I then got up from my place.

"Up until now, in the very life of mine, I knew what path I had to take, but never knew why. Why I was so obsessed with it? But for the first time, I feel there is hope to achieve that dream of mine. So, I would like to see that memory once again."

Saying that I closed my eyes.

Those strings of fate that bound me once again circled around me as a memory of a distant past opened up inside my brain.

A dazzling light filled my very self as I witnessed the memory of my past.

In a far distant past, where there was nothing, a small light created life in our universe.

That light was energy in its purest form, from which a single tree was made which illuminated all of its entirety; from that light appeared a single person... our creator.

The one responsible for the creation of life in our universe.

From that light, many forms of different energy sources were born, which aid the creator in making different living beings.

The humans, elves, and a few human-looking creatures were born from mana.

The demons, vampires and those with demonic tendencies were born from dark mana or demonic energy.

Beasts such as foxes, dragons and other monsters were born from monster energy or beast mana.

[A/N: I am bad with names, no need to criticise me.]

Thousands of creatures were born from that energy with the help of the creator.

And I was one of them. One of the people to be born from the first source of light.

Even after me, many more creatures were created.

But soon, the light began to dim, and the creator also stopped.

And he fell into a long slumber.

After the creator was gone, we began to live a life among ourselves.

In the beginning, everything was going well. We had nothing to worry about, and we did not lack anything as well.

But the problem arose when a question appeared in our head.

If the creator is gone, who will take his place?

There needs to be someone who will look after everyone, right?

That question changed all the flow we had. The once peaceful place was delved into a battlefield.

Different races chose their leader. Each one was willing to take the place of the creator.

It was the first war that took place. It was the first time, blood was spilled on this land. And the first time when someone was killed.

This was the first war fought for supremacy.

I was also in that war, even if I wasn’t willing to do it, but I had to.

I wasn’t a leader or anything like that, just a small soldier.

That war caused many losses, but some gained few things from here.

Many people rose to become God from this war and I was one of them.

One of the first gods to be born.

The war became so intense that almost half of the people were already dead.

It was then that something happened.

A very powerful entity woke up. Sensing that terrifying presence, all of them halted their steps.

They all felt it; it was an emotion that they had long forgotten; it wasn’t fear but the feeling of being an ant.

And that being was an entity that seemed to be absolute as if every word of him was a command that we could never refuse.

That entity was none other than our creator.

The person who was above all, whose will we could never refuse.

This was the feeling that drove me insane. This feeling of absolute... turned me mad.

I wanted to reach that.

I wanted to be in that realm.

Greed took place in my heart.

No matter what I wanted to achieve that.

I tried again and again and again and again, but I failed each and every single time.

I tried to reach the apex strength that I could ever reach, but no matter what I wasn’t able to achieve that.

In countless of my lives, I tried to reach it, but every time I was forced to kneel down in front of it.

From all those failures, I realised that we were never meant to surpass him.

We could never surpass him until I found the way in my previous life.

This was something I always ignored.

All of us were made from that same brilliant light, even the creator.

The only difference we had was that he was made from the purest form of brilliant light while we... we were born from an impure one.

But what if...

I combine all of the other energies. Will I not be able to surpass him then?

With this thought, I formed my plan. But I failed to do it in that life and was killed by all the gods.

When I failed, they realized what I was trying to do.

My plan was exposed.

But what they killed that day was just a clone of mine.

With my domain and my demonic core, I played the character of a fool.

A fool that played with gods, demons, mythical creatures, every single one and made them my pawns.

But I soon decided to end that life of mine.

"This is what I wanted to achieve. The perfection, a realm where my command is absolute. And this isn’t just my dream, this is our dream. To reach a place where no one can touch me."

***

Thanks for reading everyone.

A bit of backstory and a bit of cringy dialogue. But I hope you enjoyed it, if you have any confusion, you can ask me, cause I am confused as well. Well, do ask if you have some.

I have uploaded a fanfic; if there is someone who wishes to check it out, you can happily do so and support me on my ko-fi.

I am actually planning to make a manga of my own from my novels and fic and upload it there; if you guys are interested, you can join.

Stay tuned for more...