Modern Family: New Life-Chapter 103: Andrew’s Advice

Pippa was the first to arrive. As always. She was never late. Punctual, meticulous, obsessively organized. If the meeting was at 9:00 PM, she was already ringing the doorbell at 8:59.

She greeted Mitch and Cam with a smile and gave Andrew a kiss.

A few minutes later, the others arrived: Willa and Haley came together, brought by Claire; Howard and Leonard showed up together, Zach arrived with a friend, and finally Kevin showed up with Archie, who had a mission tonight.

Archie had been to these gatherings before. And that's where he first met Willa.

Sharp sarcasm, direct gaze, confident, no filter, and a total geek. And if that wasn't enough, she was really pretty, with a strange kind of elegance that made her seem untouchable.

Archie had been totally smitten.

So much so that every time they crossed paths at Andrew's house, all he could manage was a nervous "hi" and an awkward nod when she greeted him back.

But tonight... tonight he was determined.

He was going to try to talk to her. Say something more than hello. Something with intent.

He knew Willa liked comics, video games, and superhero movies. And even though he wasn't a nerd, at least he had seen Iron Man, the Spider-Man movies with Tobey Maguire, and Nolan's Batman trilogy.

That had to count for something, right?

The night kicked off with energy.

Andrew told them he had reached a million subscribers, and the reaction was instant: cheers, hugs, jokes, pillows flying through the air.

"You're officially YouTube elite now!" exclaimed Howard, raising his glass with enthusiasm.

"Well, technically he already was... he was in the top ten," Leonard added, adjusting his glasses.

"Yeah, but this is different!" Howard shot back. "Now it's seven digits, Leonard! Seven! The magic number."

"I want a raise!" he added jokingly, pointing to himself.

Everyone else congratulated Andrew too.

As the night went on, Archie saw his chance.

Willa was sitting on the edge of the couch, one leg crossed over the other, talking with Howard and Leonard.

Archie took a deep breath, tightened his grip on his plastic cup of soda, and walked over.

"Uh... hey," said Archie, forcing a smile, "Everything good?"

Willa paused, turned her head to look at him. "Yeah," she replied neutrally and turned back to Leonard and Howard, resuming the conversation.

Archie stood still for a second, realizing he had been completely brushed off, but he didn't give up.

"Were you guys talking about Batman? I saw the Nolan movies, they're really good," Archie said, trying to sound casual.

"Yes, we were talking about The Dark Knight. Heath Ledger's Joker. Did you see it?" Willa asked, barely turning her head.

"Yeah, of course. The hospital scene... brutal," said Archie, smiling, excited to have something in common.

"And Batman Begins? People always forget that one, but it's key," Howard added.

"Totally," said Leonard, "Bruce Wayne's arc, the League of Shadows, Ra's al Ghul..."

Willa nodded, crossing her arms, "And visually it was much more grounded than what came after. I liked that."

"Yeah, for sure..." Archie said, unsure of what else to add. He had seen Batman Begins a long time ago and didn't remember enough to contribute meaningfully.

'Think... Oh, right!'

"I liked the Batmobile. Very different from the previous ones, right?" Archie said.

He said it trying to sound confident, recalling something Andrew had mentioned in a quick conversation. He had tried to soak up the info like a sponge, but didn't remember much.

But as soon as he finished the sentence, Willa glanced at him from the corner of her eye, "The Tumbler?"

Her voice sounded inquisitive.

"What?" asked Archie, confused.

"The vehicle. That's its name. Tumbler. Technically, it's not a classic Batmobile, it's a military prototype. Lucius Fox says so in the movie," Willa replied, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh... yeah. The Tumbler, of course," Archie said, swallowing hard. He didn't even remember who Lucius Fox was.

Willa looked away, as if she was already losing interest, "Have you read Batman: Year One?"

"Is that another movie?" Archie asked, puzzled. Maybe it was one of the old Batman films.

"No. It's an important comic. You could say Nolan used it as a foundation for his movies," Leonard explained, adjusting his glasses.

"So... you're one of those people who only watched the movies," Willa said, shaking her head with a half-smile that wasn't friendly.

Her tone had that hidden disdain typical of fans when they spot what they consider a fake fan.

Leonard and Howard didn't say anything, but couldn't help smiling at each other.

Not out of malice, but because, even if they didn't show it, they shared that same quiet sense of superiority toward those who only consumed mainstream stuff.

"Uh...? I'm not much of a reader," Archie said, then quickly made up an excuse to leave, feeling the superior gazes of the three nerds.

He crossed the living room and went to the kitchen, where Andrew, Kevin, and Zach were pouring themselves more soda.

For some reason only they could understand, they were in the middle of a debate about whether or not the Earth was flat.

"I'm just saying, it looks flat. I don't see the curvature. Do you?" Zach said with a completely serious tone.

"You're one of those...?" Andrew muttered with a funny smile, spilling a bit of soda from looking at Zach instead of his cup.

"Come on, man! How do you explain airplane flights? Satellites? Buy a telescope and you'll see a planet in our system and its shape!" said Kevin, half amused, half amazed by how confident Zach was about the Earth being flat.

"Looks just as flat from a plane! They've been lying to us our whole lives," said Zach, with no sign of backing down.

Just then, they saw Archie walk in with slow steps and the face of someone who had just been utterly defeated.

"What happened?" Andrew asked, making room for him at the counter.

Archie let out a long sigh and poured himself a drink as if it were whiskey or something stronger.

"I failed. Completely, on my first try. I didn't know the Tumbler was the Batmobile, military version or whatever, and then she finished me off with a comic that sounds like a school calendar: Batman: Year One," Archie replied.

Zach laughed, nearly spitting out his drink.

Kevin patted him on the back, "Don't give up, that was just your first attempt. The night is young."

"And that's not even the worst part," Archie added, looking at Andrew.

"The worst part was seeing Leonard and Howard's faces. I know they're your friends, but those smug little smiles... Ugh. I swear, for a second, I wanted to punch them."

Archie had gotten close to Andrew's two nerdy friends, but he didn't really consider them close friends like he did with Andrew.

Andrew raised an eyebrow, surprised, "Seriously?"

"Yeah. And not out of pride. It's just that you've never been like that," Archie said.

"You also know a bunch about that stuff, but when we talk about superheroes and I only know the movies, you've never made me feel dumb. You've never talked down to me," Archie explained.

Andrew stayed silent for a moment, taking in those words.

Then he smiled, flattered, lowering his gaze slightly like he didn't quite know what to say.

"Wow... So I'm... perfect?" Andrew finally said in a thoughtful tone.

He said it with a mock-revelatory expression, like he had just discovered something profound about himself.

"Perfectly insufferable," Kevin replied without hesitation. "You'd be perfect if you weren't so addicted to training, diet, discipline, control... you know, all that stuff."

Andrew pulled an offended face, raising the glass in his hand, "This is soda!"

"Diet," Zach muttered, reading the label.

"Soda nonetheless, right? And I'm not that extreme," Andrew insisted.

Kevin looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I saw you counting the snacks you were eating earlier. Literally. One, two, three... like you were mentally calculating calories, fats, and carbs. I'm convinced you have a nightly max and adjust it later with your workouts," Kevin said.

Andrew opened his mouth to reply... but said nothing.

Because it was true.

"Maybe... a little extreme," Andrew admitted after a few seconds, taking a sip from his drink.

"A little? That's an understatement. You count your calories all the time, your daily steps, even track your water intake," said Kevin, shaking his head.

"Hey, you're supposed to drink at least two and a half liters a day if you're a man!" said Andrew, then raised a finger like he was giving a lecture.

"If you're a high-performance athlete, even more. Want to calculate it properly?"

"No, please..." muttered Zach.

Andrew ignored the comment and continued, pointing at his glass as if he were in a tutorial.

"You multiply your weight by 35 milliliters. Or if you want something simpler: divide your weight by 7, and that's the number of 250 ml glasses you need per day. And you also add half a liter for every hour of exercise."

Everyone went quiet for a moment.

The three of them kept chatting, but before heading back to the living room with the others, Andrew, noticing Archie's defeated aura, decided to give him some advice.

"You're approaching it the wrong way. You can't try to talk superheroes with someone who's clearly an expert in the subject. Willa isn't kind to people who don't know their stuff. You saw it today, her tone, the way she looked at you when you said you don't read comics. It was like you insulted her religion."

Archie sighed, "I just wanted to have something in common."

"Yes, I get that. But it's a mistake. You don't need to share her hobbies to talk to her. Not with Willa. Not with anyone, really. There are other ways. Classic ones. Humor, attitude, confidence. Basic flirting, ring a bell?" said Andrew, crossing his arms.

Archie raised an eyebrow, as if the phrase had come out in a foreign language.

Truth was, even though he was pretty popular at school as the team's starting sprinter, he'd never felt particularly confident when it came to romance. He'd only had one girlfriend, and it was a short relationship that ended without much of a story.

Aside from that, his experience was limited to a few kisses at parties, moments where he didn't even have to try. With loud music, a laid-back vibe, and his team jacket on, things just kind of happened.

Conversations were minimal. Initiative wasn't his strong suit.

And it's not like he did it often either. He wasn't a womanizer, nor particularly outgoing. Though he did carry a certain confidence from being a good football player and a starter on the team.

But Willa was different.

Two years older. An actress. Confident. Quick to speak and even quicker to spot insecurity.

With her, there was no room for awkwardness or generic lines. You had to approach her right, or not at all.

"Basic flirting," Archie repeated, forcing a smile to give himself some courage.

"Sounds simple when you say it," he added sincerely, without a trace of irony.

Because Andrew was... well, Andrew.

Starting quarterback. And above all, a prodigy. Part of the elite, everyone knew he'd go far.

On the team, they didn't just respect him: they followed him.

He never seemed nervous. Not in big games, not in interviews, not even now with a YouTube channel boasting over a million subscribers.

"It's not simple. I just learned not to show the nerves. And that, too, takes training," Andrew said.

Archie looked at him, intrigued, and waited for him to continue.

"You know how many times I was nervous with Pippa in the beginning?" Andrew asked.

"With Pippa?"

"Yes. You might see her as calm, serious, studious... but she's a nerd, just a different kind than me. An academic nerd. She knows a ton of stuff I don't even understand when she explains it to me. History, literature, philosophy... she can recite full lines from obscure authors I can't even pronounce," Andrew explained.

"And when I realized I liked her, I knew I couldn't just go in talking about books or writers. I'd be crushed instantly."

Andrew paused before continuing. "I was nervous all the time. More than in any game. I used to rehearse what to say to her, how not to sound dumb. Because we didn't have any hobbies in common. Nothing. But I liked the way she thought, how she expressed herself. I liked her. So I went with the clearest form of basic flirting... connection."

Archie nodded slowly. "Makes sense. I'll try that."

He had better odds with that approach than trying to talk about Willa's nerdy hobbies, which he knew nothing about.

"I didn't know you were a relationship counselor," said a familiar voice behind Andrew.

Andrew slowly turned and saw Pippa, standing by the doorway that connected the kitchen to the hallway.

She was holding her drink and looking at him with a soft smile.

"How long have you been standing there?" Andrew asked, a bit nervous. It would be kind of embarrassing if she had heard all that.

"Since: 'she can recite full lines from obscure authors I can't even pronounce,'" Pippa replied in an amused tone, walking closer.

"Oh..." said Andrew, scratching the back of his neck, slightly embarrassed.

Pippa stopped next to him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, "I knew you made an effort to get close to me... but I didn't know it felt as hard as a football game."

Andrew looked at her, "It was harder. On the field, at least, I know what to do."

Pippa laughed softly and hugged him around the waist, "And you did. Really well," she said tenderly, resting her head on his chest.

Archie watched them in silence, with a faint smile.

For a long time, he had seen Andrew as a kind of role model. The perfect captain. The one who never doubted. The one who always knew what to do.

But now, knowing that even he had felt nervous, that he too had feared saying the wrong thing, that he also had to work hard to connect with someone...

Maybe he could do it too.

Seeing that Kevin and Zach were no longer in the kitchen, and that Andrew and Pippa were having a private moment, Archie headed back to the living room, feeling renewed.

"So, you ended up helping him," said Pippa, once Archie was no longer in the room.

"Yeah... I felt bad seeing him so defeated, and his way of approaching Willa was wrong from the start," Andrew replied, having gotten involved.

Pippa lifted her head slightly and looked at him. "And do you remember what we talked about when you told me he wanted your help?"

"Yes... that I shouldn't get involved in love triangles," Andrew said with a sigh.

"Exactly," said Pippa, raising an eyebrow slightly, "It's already enough that, thanks to coming here, he gets a chance to try something with Willa. You don't need to act as his romantic coach."

Andrew didn't reply immediately. He knew Leonard was also interested in Willa.

And even though Willa didn't seem romantically interested in either of them, the tension was still there, especially with two guys from the same circle orbiting around the same girl.

"I know," said Andrew, "But I didn't get that involved. I just gave him some advice. A good one, I think."

"I'm just saying, if you want to help your friend, that's fine, but I don't want you getting caught in the middle of something that could blow up later, and end up not knowing which side to take," said Pippa.

Andrew nodded silently. He knew Pippa wasn't saying it out of reproach, but out of care.

"I know," Andrew repeated softly, gently running his fingers through her hair.

They stayed like that for a few more seconds, and then returned to the living room, where the group conversation had naturally picked up again.

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